The past few days I had been feeling pretty low about my current situation. Mind you, NOT feeling sorry for myself, more just a mixture of anger, frustration, and a bit of depression.
At the same time, while I was feeling so low myself. I had been chatting with a couple of people who were going through some tough times and feeling depressed. I had been thinking about this as it relates to my own emotional state. During our chats I had not let on to these people that I was going through a "rough patch" myself but instead listened to them, proferred advise and cheerful thoughts, and generally did what I could to cheer them up. And they did seem in a somewhat better mood for it.
It's interesting that one can offer these things to others and try to help them through a tough time, but can't seem to take your own advice and cheerful thoughts. Mentally, I know and understand about the mechanisms of depression. I've been through the therapy and treatment for depression, been through the medication therapy, the whole nine yards.
But, when it comes down to it, it seems easier to offer help to others in need than to help yourself. Odd, isn't it? Having been through severe clinical depression, I understand and empathize with someone who is depressed. I can relate to them. But I sometimes can't seem to relate to myself and my own low feelings. I find this very strange.
I also know though that helping these folks through their tough time does help me too. It allows me to focus on them and trying to help them by listening and letting them vent their problems. That helps more than anything, just being able to express the feelings and problems. and having someone who cares listen.
It is strange that it's easier to help someone else than to help yourself.