Testicle Festival

Truth is Wierder Than Fiction

Published on August 28, 2004 By MasonM In Blogging

This past week was National Truck Drivers Appreciation Week. For one week out of the year the truckstops and other trucking-related businesses pretend they appreciate the truck drivers. Usually there are some free things they give away, drawings, etc... Last night I stopped for the night at a truckstop in Missoula, Montana.

I was treated to a free dinner (buffalo burger), was given a free pocket knife, and entered into a $300 drawing being held Sept. 1st. Not nad at all, really. It is nice to be officially appreciated if not actually. After I finished my meal, I wandered over to the bar for a cold one. On the door was a poster with a couple of cartoon bulls on it, standing upright with their legs crossed and "hands" covering their privates.

The poster read "Testicle Festival.......Have a Ball........ Annual Rocky Mountain Oyster Festival"

Ummmmm.........I thought it must be some kinda joke at first, but nope, it's a real event.

Now, I wouldn't exactly rank eating bull balls very highly on my list of dietary options. Not on there at all, actually. Pretty disgusting. But, to be so damned enamoured of them to throw an annual party in their honor is just plain weird.

I can't even imagine the conversation that lead to this bizarre event. "Hey, these bull nuts are pretty good, let's throw a party for em!" or something like that.

Life must be pretty boring in that area if eating bull balls is the highlight of the social calendar. Sorry folks, I just don't get it.

This morning, about 15 minutes after I left the truckstop I see a billboard on the side of the highway. Sure enough "Testicle Festival Have a ball"

Geez.

Comments

citahellion

on Aug 28, 2004

Reminds me of the old joke....

A tourist is in Spain, and goes to a fancy restaurant for dinner. As he looks around, he notices a diner being served a beautifully garnished dish with two gigantic meatballs in the middle. When the waiter asks him for his order, the man asks him about the meatball dish. The waiter explains that the meatballs are bull's testicles, and when the bull loses the bullfight, the bull is brought to the restaurant, and this beautiful dish is made. The diner tells the waiter that he wants the bulls testicles for dinner, but the waiter tells him that only one bull a day is brought to the restaurant, but he can have it tommorrow. The diner agrees. The next day the diner goes to the restaurant, and orders the testicle dish. When his food is brought out, he notices that the meatballs are extremely small. He mentions this to the waiter, and the waiter replies, ''Well sir you have to understand, sometimes the bull wins''.

kingbee

on Aug 28, 2004

the phenomenon must slowly be moving its way east. the first time i remember seeing rocky mountain oysters was on a menu in wyoming (in a place where the length of my hair had already endeared me to four or five cowboys who were hoping id provide just one additional reason for them to tie me the back of a pickup and drag me to the county line). of course, i just had to ask what they were

. at least it got a big laugh. but even if i was hit with the instant realization my whole life had been nothing more than a buildup to the moment i could taste my first bull ball (and i honestly felt exactly the opposite), i would have repressed the urge or left the premises.

Gideon MacLeish

on Aug 28, 2004

Wow...this is a good addition to the smalltown festivals I am collecting. Thanks.

Angloesque

on Sep 12, 2004

Hey, regarding the truck driver's appreciation, you won't find me to be one of those jerks who cuts in front of semis or tails them or does stupid things around them. I appreciate them a lot, 'cause where I come from it's grain trucks that get our crops out, and log trucks that get our logs out. Most of the kids I went to school with got their CDLs the day they turned 18 (if not before, under the farm licenses provision, I think). I've even been helped out roadside by truckers, and generally find them to be good people and better drivers than most passenger car drivers.

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