A bunch of useless crap
Published on August 11, 2006 By MasonM In Misc
I've had more than 300 sutures/staples in my life so far. I've had a double lumbar lamenectomy (sp?). I've had my neck broken. I've had my eyes rendered non functional by lightening. I've had my pelvis shattered. I've had my spleen and a lung punctured by bullets. I've had my colon pierced by a knife. I've had my body breached by numerous attacks and accidents.

By rights I should probably be dead. Been damned close to it a few times. But the human body is an amazing thing. It's really amazing what it can recover from. I have actually seen part of my own brain in the mirror thanks to an attack by an enraged person with a baseball bat (he died).

The human body is amazing in the way it heals itself. Given time the human body can heal from damn near anything.

What spawned this article? A hang nail.

Comments
on Aug 11, 2006
Here I was getting ready to make a serious comment and then I read two words...."a hangnail"! hahahahaha...darn it M, you're so dramatic! But yeah, you're absolutely correct, the human body can certainly go through a lot and recover from most of what afflicts it. And M, you're one lucky fellow! (I wanted to say sob in the most affectionate way, but fellow will do quite (lady like) and nicely!)
on Aug 11, 2006
Hang nails hurt.
on Aug 11, 2006
Good God...I haven't even broken a bone yet...actually the worst injury I've ever had was a mildly sprained wrist. You're quite lucky, or maybe not...I mean all that stuff did happen to you...but you did live through it....well, there are two kinds of luck. Ok, I'm going to confuse myself if I follow that train of thought. The power of the body is great....it heals to the best of its ability.

And hang nails are quite annoying.

~Zoo
on Aug 11, 2006
#3 by Zoologist03
Fri, August 11, 2006 11:45 PM




Good God...I haven't even broken a bone yet...actually the worst injury I've ever had was a mildly sprained wrist. You're quite lucky, or maybe not...I mean all that stuff did happen to you...but you did live through it....well, there are two kinds of luck. Ok, I'm going to confuse myself if I follow that train of thought. The power of the body is great....it heals to the best of its ability.

And hang nails are quite annoying


Your reply seriously appeals to my twisted sense of humor.

Shit happens. The more you dive into life, the more shit that's gonna happen.
on Aug 12, 2006
Your reply seriously appeals to my twisted sense of humor


Hah hah...my humor is rather twisted in itself.

Speaking of shit happens...I've added on to it:

"Shit happens, then you flush it." I'm convinced that it's very insightful...even if a bit vulgar.

~Zoo
on Aug 12, 2006
"Shit happens, then you flush it." I'm convinced that it's very insightful...even if a bit vulgar



Haha, Zoo, quite profound! I like it!
on Aug 12, 2006
"Shit happens, then you flush it." I'm convinced that it's very insightful...even if a bit vulgar.

It is now a permanent addendum to the expression.
on Aug 12, 2006

GD! Hangnails!  I have had it all!  But them damn hang nails!

Will some one call me a manicurist?  Please!  I mean after all, I am paying for this time!

Geez!  No respect.

on Aug 12, 2006
Mason...are you serious? Are all those injuries for real?

If so I want to read the story about the baseball bat and the bullet.
on Aug 12, 2006
#8 by Dr. Guy
Sat, August 12, 2006 7:13 PM



[Dr. Guy]

GD! Hangnails! I have had it all! But them damn hang nails!

Will some one call me a manicurist? Please! I mean after all, I am paying for this time!

Geez! No respect.


on Aug 12, 2006
#9 by Tova7
Sat, August 12, 2006 9:56 PM



[Tova7]
Mason...are you serious? Are all those injuries for real?

If so I want to read the story about the baseball bat and the bullet.


Yeah, life is rough. The stories aren't nearly as interesting as you might think.
on Aug 12, 2006
The stories aren't nearly as interesting as you might think


I don't know....a baseball bat...your brains in the mirror....the man dies...that by itself sounds pretty interesting.

Bullets entering your body....I don't know how that could be boring.

You should blog about it sometime. If ya feel like it.