Judge Orders Separation Of Church And State

Published on July 16, 2006 By MasonM In Current Events

From the Weekly World News: Link

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Frank Church and Sandra State were living together for nine months when they appeared before Judge Horace Belchick on a routine housing zoning matter. They were stunned at what happened next.

Judge Belchick ordered them to agree to separate, immediately.

"We were flabbergasted!" said Frank. "We were sitting there holding hands, very much in love -- and he hit us with this!"

"Separation of church and state is one of our country's bedrock principles," said Judge Belchick. "I won't have them undermining it by flagrant cohabitation."

Tori Appling, a legal analyst who sits in courtrooms in case a reporter ever wants to talk to a legal analyst, said, "With the walls between religion and government crumbling, some officials feel they must draw the line at even the most innocent incidents."

For her part, Sandra was outraged. "Any moron knows that when the Founding Fathers called for a separation of church and state, they weren't talking about Frank and me."

But Frank wasn't so sure. "I thought about it. I love Sandy but I also love my country. And if a judge says our relationship is unconstitutional, then maybe we shouldn't be together."

Sandra shot him a look. "I can't believe you just said that! It's so -- stupid!"

"Who are you calling stupid?" Frank demanded.

"You, I guess," Sandra said. "Why don't we just get married? I'll take your name and the matter will be closed."

"Sure, until you want to call our first born 'Johnny State Church,' " he snapped. "Then what will we do?"

A constitutional crisis was averted as Church and State were last seen going separate ways.

Comments

ParaTed2k

on Jul 16, 2006

Hillarious Mason!! I laughed until I stopped!!!!

MasonM

on Jul 16, 2006

#1 by ParaTed2k
Sun, July 16, 2006 6:58 PM

[ParaTed2k]
Hillarious Mason!! I laughed until I stopped!!!!

Glad ya liked it as much as I did

Dr Guy

on Jul 17, 2006

This was great!

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