A bunch of useless crap
Published on July 12, 2006 By MasonM In Humor
On a food related forum I visit from time to time someone posted a question asking "How do you make corn nuts?"

Now I know perfectly well what they were wanting to know but I just couldn't resist posting the reply "The best way that I know of to make corn nuts is to tease it unmercifully".

If ya don't know the answer, at least say so in an amusing way, no?

So, does anyone else have any good, not so good, or just plain groan inducing food jokes?

Comments
on Jul 12, 2006

This is a true one:

My husband once asked me "what's a mango?"

My response: "oh, about 3 miles an hour if he's swift"

 

on Jul 13, 2006
A man goes into a bar. It's a slow day and there's no one else there. The bartender yells from the back room that he'll be out in a minute. Suddenly, the guy hears an attractive voice: "Nice shirt your're wearing. You look very good in stripes."

The guy looks around but there's no one there.

Then the voice says: "And what a great tie. You have excellent taste."
Now the man is really spooked. As soon as the bartender comes out, he tells him about the voice.

"Oh," says the bartender, "That must be the peanuts. They're complimentary."
on Jul 13, 2006
Q: How do you make a cream puff?

A: Chase it around the block!


Q: How do you make a hot dog stand?

A: Take away its chair!


Q: How do you make an egg roll?

A: Push it!
on Jul 13, 2006
Okay, the groans are coming thick and fast...

How do you make a hormone? Kick her in the twat...

What do you call a man with a rabbit up his bum? Warren...

on Jul 13, 2006
I wish I could remember some right about now.  But I dont want to ruin this great streak going! 
on Jul 13, 2006
#1 by dharmagrl
Wed, July 12, 2006 9:56 PM



[dharmagrl]

This is a true one:

My husband once asked me "what's a mango?"

My response: "oh, about 3 miles an hour if he's swift"



on Jul 13, 2006
#2 by uDigItTheMost
Thu, July 13, 2006 00:13 AM




A man goes into a bar. It's a slow day and there's no one else there. The bartender yells from the back room that he'll be out in a minute. Suddenly, the guy hears an attractive voice: "Nice shirt your're wearing. You look very good in stripes."

The guy looks around but there's no one there.

Then the voice says: "And what a great tie. You have excellent taste."
Now the man is really spooked. As soon as the bartender comes out, he tells him about the voice.

"Oh," says the bartender, "That must be the peanuts. They're complimentary."


Close to a groan, but
on Jul 13, 2006
#3 by uDigItTheMost
Thu, July 13, 2006 00:38 AM




Q: How do you make a cream puff?

A: Chase it around the block!


Q: How do you make a hot dog stand?

A: Take away its chair!


Q: How do you make an egg roll?

A: Push it!


groan

thanks
on Jul 13, 2006
#4 by dynamaso
Thu, July 13, 2006 01:46 AM



[dynamaso]
Okay, the groans are coming thick and fast...

How do you make a hormone? Kick her in the twat...

What do you call a man with a rabbit up his bum? Warren...


food, mate, food
on Jul 13, 2006
#5 by Dr. Guy
Thu, July 13, 2006 09:02 AM



[Dr. Guy]
I wish I could remember some right about now. But I dont want to ruin this great streak going!


Jump right in.
on Jul 14, 2006
food, mate, food


Ah, I thought I was giving you 'food' for thought...
on Jul 14, 2006
#11 by dynamaso
Fri, July 14, 2006 01:42 AM



[dynamaso]
food, mate, food


Ah, I thought I was giving you 'food' for thought...


on Oct 23, 2006
What's the difference between Apple Pie and Pussy?

You can eat your Moms Apple Pie.
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