I can't count the number of conversations I have had over the years with someone bemoaning the fact that they are single. It's difficult for me to empathize with their plight. I was married for a little more than 12 years and am very happy to be unentangled in a romatic relationship.
My life now is pretty simple and uncomplicated. I like it that way. I have no-one to answer to. I come and go as I please. I am in no way responsible for making someone else happy (as if that's even possible), nor am I responsible for making someone unhappy.
I have had two long term romantic relationships in my life. One lasted about 13 years and I married her, the second lasted almost 8 years. The latter relationship ended just about 2 years ago, and I haven't been involved with or dated anyone since. Romantic relationships are just too messy and complicated to suit me.
By nature I am a loner. I have never been one to follow a crowd or join a group. I prefer to operate on my own being responsible for my own actions, successes, and failures. I am comfortable with my own company. I am not antisocial by any means. I enjoy conversation and good company which is probably why I have always been drawn to bars and taverns; they are the historical venue for social interaction. It's only the romatic interactions I tend to avoid. I don't think I have ever in my life experienced that feeling of being truly lonely. Bored at times, yes, lonely, no. Perhaps if I were somhow isolated from all human contact I would feel lonely.
I tend to be pretty open and fun-loving and thus can always find someone with whom to talk. I guess I must be a pretty likeable bloke as people tend to warm up to me pretty quickly and it's not at all unusual for some guy to strike up a conversation with me. I know I am not the most handsome guy on the planet, far from it, but I guess I'm not too ugly because it's not unusual for women to strike up a conversation with me either. I've had my share come on to me. Typically I pass on that as I don't want the complications.
As I sit here listening to a Prokofiev piece from Romeo and Juliet, I guess I can understand how a person may feel that they need another person to make them whole and their life complete. I just don't feel it. I am a whole person, as is.
By no means do I dislike women. My best friends have usually been women. I'm really not sure why that is, I just know that's the way it is. I've had a couple of very close male friends and my best friend in the world through college and for 10 years after was a highly irresponsible guy with whom I got into many adventures and a few jails with. Sadly, he married and settled down. But I've had, and do have, far more female friends than male friends. Some of my women friends I have slept with, others I haven't. At no time was there any "romance" involved on either my part nor their's. We were/are friends.
Many of my female friends are married (never, ever slept with any of them as that would be against my personal code of honor). We can be friends, confidants, and even drinking buddies without any sexual or romatic pressures at all. We can simply enjoy each other's company and have a good time. I like that. Kinda like a male friend but nicer to look at across a pitcher of brew.
I've had one female friend, who is married, for several years. A couple of years back she expressed an interest in sex. Once I told her that was totally out of the question on principle, she informed me that her husband had put her up to it and she knew I'd turn her down flat. I am now also good friends with her husband whom I had never met before then (a HUGE biker).
Yeah, I'm satisfied being single. I came into this world alone, and am perfectly satisfied to go out of it alone. Doesn't mean I can't have fun in between.
This has to be the longest rambling article I have ever written, not to mention the most personal. Other than the few beers I've had I'm not even sure why I'm writing it. Oh yeah, thanks to Trudy and Dr. Guy for inspiring this rambling nonsense.